Nigerian rapper and singer, Modupe-Oreoluwa Oyeyemi Ola, known by her stage name as Mocheddah has revealed that she suffered depression, due to hostility and hate in the music industry.
In a recent interview with DANG MONOLOGUE, Mocheddah opens up on her battles, and how she almost took her life.
She said: “I was coming from a naive, God-fearing family and I went into the world of adults and I was thrown into a jungle and people did not care if I was 16, they attacked me.
“The industry was hostile. I would be performing and they would turn off my microphone because the A-list artist doesn’t like me. I didn’t know there was hate. I never knew hate.
“There was one day I looked at my Mum and told her ‘you taught me everything about love but you did not teach me to hate’. I don’t know why she did not, but the truth is there is hate in the world, so I went into the industry thinking everybody loved everybody. I didn’t understand that hate”.
She also spoke about how she won the Channel O Music Award and how her name was dragged because of the award.
She stated: “The day I won the Channel O award, that was around when Twitter came out and people I knew started dragging me online.
“People started asking why I won the award, people starting questioning me and carrying stories around me.
“How do I meet a legend and I kneel down to say hi to her and she is like ‘Get off me’, a woman I have looked up to for years, the industry was hostile”.
She further said, when she left her record label, Knighthouse, people did not want to hear her side of the story, which broke her, leading to depression.
She said: “What broke me was that when I left my label. People chose to pick sides and obviously it wasn’t mine.
“I felt as if I had failed, especially because I had thought that business will pick up. They had so much hate for me.
“They started bad-mouthing me to people, to companies, to producers, so I was kind of blacklisted. They wanted to do everything in their power to ruin me and I felt God forsook me, sadness consumed me.
“I googled ‘there is this darkness inside me’ and I saw a lot of people had it, they were talking about depression.
“The only reason I did not kill myself, first, I didn’t know how I will kill myself. I thought about it so many times. I thought of drowning myself in third Mainland bridge, at times I wanted it to be quick, so I will be praying that God should just kill me.
“All I had to do was understand that as long as I was at peace with this person, every other thing will be OK. I live to be happy.”
